Internal Family Systems — IFS — is a way of understanding the mind that assumes we are not made up of a single voice, but of many. Developed by Dr. Richard Schwartz in the 1980s, it invites us to notice the different "parts" of ourselves — the part that wants rest, the part that pushes hardest, the part that stays quiet when it matters most — and to relate to them with curiosity instead of judgment.
The idea of "parts"
You've probably said it already, in ordinary language: "Part of me wants to go, part of me doesn't." IFS takes that experience seriously. Each part carries its own feelings, memories, and reasons for existing — often trying, in its own way, to protect you. Many of the patterns that feel most stuck are two parts pulling in opposite directions.
The Self at the center
IFS also assumes there is a calmer, wiser core — the Self — underneath all the noise. The Self isn't a part; it's the you who can listen to a part without becoming it. Much of the work is helping the Self step forward: with warmth and steady attention, and without needing to fix, silence, or perform.
What a session can look like
Together we notice what's showing up — a knot in your chest, a familiar critical voice, a small tender feeling — and get curious about it. We ask what it's worried about, what it's trying to do for you, and what it might need. Nothing is forced; parts often soften simply because someone has finally paid attention.
IFS pairs well with other approaches — it can sit inside a psychodynamic frame, run alongside somatic or EMDR work, and support cognitive tools without collapsing into them. In my practice it is one of several lenses, chosen when it fits.
If a version of "part of me…" is showing up a lot lately, I'd be glad to talk.
This article is educational and is not a substitute for professional care.